If you cry in the shower did you actually cry?

everyone’s waiting

I know all the lines to say

The part I’m expected to play

But in the reflection I am worlds away

As I put my costume on

Eyelashes one by one

Been doing this so long I can..

Tie the knot

behind my back

Cause everyone’s waiting



just having my breakfast nbd

can’t afford cereal
Imagine Harry Potter was set in Australia.

“Three blokes sitting outside the pub lift their heads as they hear a car engine rumbling, to their disbelief, the iconic 2008 Holden ute flies overhead, nothing but the wooping of the two young boys driving it and AC/DC blasting out of the sound system can be heard.”

“You’re a cunt Harry” says Hagrid, Harry looking like a stunned mullet.
“Oi nah fuck off mate” replies Harry, disbelief written all over him. 

(Source: elantrian-worldhopper, via beperpetuallydrunk)



good thing there’s no cats on mars

see the joke is that curiosity killed the cat

(via laughing420)

Forecast: cloudy with chance of deep dark depression

If you’re reading this then it means you’re following me.

Congratulations on your excellent decision.

(Source: catchafir3, via flayyy-deactivated20140619)


nobody ever asks how’s waldo

(via wabbitwanderer95)